Sunday, January 18, 2009

Free to a Good Home - Irritating Little Brother

Scrappy and I have discussed this at some length, like two seconds and we have come to the conclusion that he has become to irritating to keep around. His constant attacks upon our persons can no longer be tolerated. Even attacking us in our boudoir. Please take him off our paws. He is free to a good home. Ah, heck, any home will do.

Scrappy: Badness, we have to make him sound good so someone will want him.

Badness: How do we make someone so irritating sound good?

Scrappy: Well, what are his good qualities?

Badness: Hum....he is less irritating when he is asleep.

Scrappy: Good, good....::makes note:: What else?

:::clock ticks:::Sun moves through the sky:::

Badness: He makes a good paper weight when he is asleep?

Scrappy: That is true too. He is also good a knocking over the food bag and scattering it all over the kitchen floor. He is very good at that.

Badness: Oh! He is good at decorating with carpet fibers dug up out of the carpet! He is very artful about the places he leaves them. And the way he ripped up the carpet on the stairs and just left the piece hanging there? That was good.

Scrappy: Oh, yes, and the way he barfs under the bed just out of the Mother's reach.

:::sun continues moving the sky, shadows move across the floor, feline brows wrinkle:::

Badness: I can't think of anything else. That will have to do.

Scrappy:::sighing::: Yes, yes, that is good.

Badness: A sister attacking and yet precision barfing, carpet decorating, food bag ripping, gifted paper weight. Free to any home.

1 comment:

Everycat said...

I think that's an excellent write up for him. I think there will be queues around the block!

Whicky Wuudler